How Did We Go From Can’t Sleep In the Same Bed To Porn On TV?

My mom was really strict about what we were exposed to growing up. We weren't allowed to watch real people tv shows, only cartoons for pretty much all of elementary school. I remember when Hannah Montana first came out when I was 8. All of my friends were watching it, but not my sister or I. I would go to friends houses and their parents would let us watch things they deemed fine, and I'd come home to tell my mom and she'd be outraged. Two examples of this were My Girl and Twister. I was probably around 7 with My Girl and maybe 9 when I watched Twister.

It always infuriated me that I wasn't able to watch what my friends were watching. I told her that watching things on TV wasn't going to affect me and it wasn't a big deal. Ironically, now that I'm a mother I'd say I'm even stricter. My mom wanted to watch The Lion King with my three year old and I told her no because of the scene where Mufasa dies. I don't want Stella exposed to that violence and sadness at such a young age. My mom wasn't particularly strict about music, we just listened to what she listened to which was pop or oldies. I am very conservative when it comes to the music my children listen to. I only really like country, contemporary christian, and Taylor Swift but contemporary christian is the only music I'm comfortable listening to with my kids. I could (and will) do a whole nother blog post about music and how I feel it influenced my life.

In middle school when I would be begging my mom to watch a show or movie that had a sex scene in it, my mom would make the point "I wouldn't invite you into my bedroom to watch me have sex so why would I allow you to watch it on T.V.?" Whens he would say this it would make me really uncomfortable because who wants to think about their mom having sex? I would exclaim it wasn't anything like that and that's gross but now that I'm older I'm thinking, is it really that different?

We know that porn is detrimental. It's detrimental to your brain, your sex life, your marriage/relationships, your confidence... I could go on. Is watching a sex scene in a movie really that different? I can see the argument that you're not watching a movie to be aroused or get off, and so it may not be having quite the same affect. With that said though, you can't deny that it creates a very unrealistic expectation for sex.

Without going into detail, I'll just say I have a very happy and fulfilling sex life. I can't say that I've ever experienced sex like it's depicted in movies though. Or at least not every time. The ripping off of clothes, the can't get enough of each other, the quick orgasms. Lack of awkward positioning and moments, getting to in your head or distracted, lack of or delayed lubrication.

When I was talking to my friend about this and trying to figure out why sex scenes have become such a common thing in movies, she said it's an expression of art. I call bullshit. I think it's a result of the oversexualization of our culture. It's just another way for society to subvert the sacredness of sex. To put it bluntly, it's yet another example of the devil at work in our world.

If the sex scenes weren't enough, please explain to me why we need full on views of actresses breasts????? I don't want to see women's breasts, I don't want my husband seeing other women's breasts, and I certainly don't want to sit next to him while we watch them jiggle together. And no, it doesn't bother me from a insecurity stand point. I know Jakob prefers my breasts over anyone elses and he's not oogling at them in a sexual manner, but it's still awkward. I'm the first person to stand up for the fact that breasts aren't just sexual objects for men, hello I've been breastfeeding for the last 3 years. I don't think that women should cover up to breastfeed to avoid other men seeing them when they're being used for what they were designed for, but that's a world away from what they're shown for in movies. It's just another way to get more views, mainly men. If you say no man ever watches a movie to see a given actresses breasts or sex scene, you're naive.

I don't think we need to go back to the times when men and women couldn't share a bed on television, but we've certainly taken it way too far left. If a man and a woman are kissing a scene cuts out or they disappear into a bedroom, we all know what's happening we don't need a visualization. I was pleasantly surprised when I recently went to see It Ends With Us and there were no sex scenes. I want to emphasized, I was SURPRISED I didn't have to sit through a porn scene. It shouldn't be like that. And for the ones that do have sex scenes in them, why aren't they all rated R? What 13 year old needs to be seeing a sex scene!? And how did freaking Marley and Me Get away with a PG rating??? Honestly, Marley and Me is a prime example of how every movie should be. They allude to sex, they talk about it, but they don't explicitly show it. With that said though, that movie should definitely be rated at least PG-13 but I wouldn't even want my 13 year old watching it. Another thing I wouldn’t want even my 13 year old seeing: the weird innuendo scenes Nickelodeon had with Ariana Grande??? Have you seen Quiet on Set? Children’s television is so messed up. The perversion starts long before the porn scenes in PG-13+ movies…

I'm so grateful my mom "sheltered me." It's only served me in life. I heard a saying once, "I'm not raising my kids under a rock. I'm raising them in a greenhouse, I'm only giving them what they need to grow and keeping what would hinder their growth out." I was raised in a greenhouse and I'm doing the same for my children. And I'm not embarrassed to say they will be better off for it, no matter who I offend.

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